My Grandmother's Passing

A week ago, my grandmother 'Nani' passed away. She was closer than a grandmother to me and is the one who I can thank for my art gene and fascination with natural medicine - basically, the person I have become today. I connected to her in a way that for me was primal and extremely attached. Though a part of me is relieved that she is no longer suffering physically, I felt such heartbreak to know that she is no longer in the body that I knew. Knowing that she was going to pass before it happened, I thought I might be somewhat prepared - but I found myself moved by intense grief that I have never felt before.

I have had prophetic dreams in the past so I was eager to get a visit, but I haven't had one yet. My husband says she'll come when I least expect it. What I did feel at first was this incredible void inside me missing someone who showed me such unconditional love in my life. What I realized and became aware of, was that even though her form is no longer here - I actually feel that unconditional love from her stronger than I did when she was in her form but physically far away from me.

All of her words of wisdom came into my mind and suddenly I remembered things that I thought were lost somewhere in my subconscious mind since childhood. I am so lucky to have had such an amazing woman like her as my grandmother. Her legacy was her family - all the way down to her great grandchildren. I am proud to be a part of her family and feel more lucky than ever before.

I am attaching a painting that I call 'Dialog'. I started it out as an abstract painting without form. But then I saw how part of face can fit into the shapes of the painting. Then I stepped back and what I saw was a person - and the image of their form as well as an image of their essence. I called it Dialog because it's the form connecting with the essence. I want to continue to have a dialog with my grandmother forever. I love you Nani!